Question 1 - About when you fell in love
- What were you doing when YOU fell in love with your spouse?
- What did you do that was so fun?
Write it down.
- What stirred you up?
- What were you doing the moment you knew you were in love?
- What did you remember that left you feeling you wanted to spend the rest of your life with your spouse?
Write that down
Question 2 - About when you recovered from a fight with your spouse
- What upset you both? Perhaps those are things you would want to remember so you both can avoid doing them the same way again.
- What hurt each of you about that fight?
- What was there about your perspective that made each of you sensitive to what happened?
No doubt there was a good reason for each of you to have that perspective. But is there a different way to see what happened that would also be true and take the sting away from the situation? A different perspective?
Think back to your conflict.
What were you both doing that not only stopped the fighting but helped bring happiness back to you both and helped you have a change of perspective so you would not be vulnerable to the same problem happening again?
Did this exercise give you some insight to help others or your self?
- How do you plan to use this?
- When do you think you will have an opportunity to help a couple or family who is hurting?
- How can you do it without making them feel you are meddling?
- If they take it as meddling, what will you do to avoid being defensive or upset?
- Could you apologize and respect them and back away and let them handle it on their own?
Sometimes they can express a need for you to back off and not meddle and yet still take your advice and appreciate it greatly later. Your goal is not to get immediate appreciation but to help them and let them take it from there.
Can you be happy if it works that way?